Marriott Edgar ( )

William Rufus

The reign of King William the Second 
Were an uninteresting affair
Theres only two things thats remembered of him 
Thats his sudden death and his red hair.

He got his red hair from his Mother, 
The crown that he wore were his Dads,
And the arrow that came at the end of his reign 
Were a well-deserved gift from the lads.

For William were cunning and cruel, 
Addicted to every vice
Hed bluster and perjure and ravage and murder, 
Apart from all that... he weren t nice.

Hed two brothers called Robert and Henry, 
One older, one younger than he,
And by terms of the Will of old Conqueror Bill 
The estate had been split into three.

Thus William became King of England; 
And Normandy... that went to Bob;
Young Hal got no throne, but received a cash bonus
Instead of a regular job.

But Bob werent content with his Dukedom, 
And Will werent content with his throne
Both wanted the lot and each started to plot 
How to add tother share to his own.

Young Hal went from one to the other,
Telling each as be thought he were right,
And mixing the pudding he roused the bad blood in 
Them both till they reckoned theyd fight. 

So Will got his army together
And planned an invasion of France,
But HaI chanced to find out what Will had in mind
And sent Robert a line in advance. 

The result were when Bill crossed the Channel,
Instead of tsurprise that were meant,
He was met on the shore by Duke Bob and his Normans.
And came back as fast as he went.

And later when Bob crossed to England, 
Intending to ravage and sack,
It were Henry again who upset the campaign 
And twere Robert this time that went back

After one or two simlar debacles 
They tumbled to Henrys tricks,
And joined with each other to find their young brother
And take him and knock him for six.

But Henry got wind of their coming, 
And made off without more ado
To his fortified pitch on the Isle of St. Michel,
From which he cocked snooks at the two.

When they found things had come to a deadlock
They shook hands and called it a day,
But though Henry pretended that quarrels was ended 
He still had a card he could play.

He came back to England with William 
And started a whispering campaign
To spoil his prestige with his vassals and lieges 
Which whispering wasnt in vain.

For one day when William were hunting 
An arrow from somewhere took wing,
And William were shot, falling dead on the spot,
And Henry proclaimed himself King.

So young Henry, who started with nothing, 
At the finish held England in thrall,
And as Bob were away with a party Crusading,
He pinched his possessions and all.

Marriott Edgar's other poems:
  1. Alberts Return
  2. Henry the Seventh
  3. Albert and the Eadsman
  4. Queen Matilda
  5. Richard Coeur-de-Lion

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