The Rating of Poets • The Rating of Poems
Poem by William Harrison Ainsworth
Jerry Juniper’s Chant
In a box1 of the stone jug2 I was born,
Of a hempen widow3 the kid forlorn.
Fake away,
And my father, as I’ve heard say,
Fake away.
Was a merchant of capers4 gay,
Who cut his last fling with great applause,
Nix my doll pals, fake away5.
Who cut his last fling with great applause,6
To the tune of a “hearty choke with caper sauce.”
Fake away.
The knucks in quod7 did my schoolmen play,
Fake away,
And put me up to the time of day;
Until at last there was none so knowing,
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
Until at last there was none so knowing,
No such sneaksman8 or buzgloak9 going.
Fake away.
Fogles10 and fawnies11 soon went their way,
Fake away,
To the spout12 with the sneezers13 in grand array.
No dummy hunter14 had forks15 so fly;
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
No dummy hunter had forks so fly,
No knuckler16 so deftly could fake a cly17,
Fake away.
No slour’d hoxter18 my snipes19 could stay,
Fake away.
None knap a reader20 like me in the lay.
Soon then I mounted in swell-street high.
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
Soon then I mounted in swell-street high,
And sported my flashiest toggery21,
Fake away.
Firmly resolved I would make my hay,
Fake away,
While Mercury’s star shed a single ray;
And ne’er was there seen such a dashing prig22,
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
And ne’er was there seen such a dashing prig,
With my strummel faked in the newest twig23.
Fake away.
With my fawnied famms24, and my onions gay25,
Fake away;
My thimble of ridge26, and my driz kemesa27;
All my togs were so niblike28 and splash,
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
All my togs were so niblike and splash,
Readily the queer screens I then could smash29;
Fake away.
But my nuttiest blowen30, one fine day,
Fake away,
To the beaks31 did her fancy man betray,
And thus was I bowled out at last32
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
And thus was I bowled out at last,
And into the jug for a lag was cast33;
Fake away.
But I slipped my darbies34 one morn in May,
Fake away,
And gave to the dubsman35 a holiday.
And here I am, pals, merry and free,
A regular rollicking romany36.
Nix my doll pals, fake away.
1 Cell.
2 Newgate.
3 A woman whose husband has been hanged.
4 A dancing-master.
5 “Nothing, comrades; on, on,” supposed to be addressed by a thief to his confederates.
6 Thus Victor Hugo, in "Le Dernier Jour d’un Condamné," makes an imprisoned felon sing:
“J’le ferai danser une danse
Où il n’y a pas de plancher.”
7 Thieves in prison.
8 Shoplifter.
9 Pickpocket.
10 Handkerchiefs.
11 Rings.
12 To the pawnbroker.
13 Snuff-boxes.
14 Pickpocket.
15 The two forefingers used in picking a pocket.
16 Pickpocket.
17 Pick a pocket.
18 No inside coat-pocket; buttoned up.
19 Scissors.
20 Steal a pocket-book.
21 Best-made clothes.
22 Thief.
23 With my hair dressed in the first fashion.
24 With several rings on my hands.
25 Seals.
26 Gold watch.
27 Laced shirt.
28 Gentlemanlike.
29 Easily than forged notes could I pass.
30 Favorite mistress.
31 Police.
32 Taken at length.
33 Cast for transportation.
34 Fetters.
35 Turnkey.
36 Gipsy.
William Harrison Ainsworth
William Harrison Ainsworth's other poems:
- One Foot in the Stirrup, or Turpin's First Fling
- The Game of High Toby
- The Modern Greek
- The Legend of Valdez
- The Twice-Used Ring
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